I’ve had the same haircut for the past 16 years. A shaved head — number two on top and a one around the sides with a slight fade. On paper it’s one of the easiest haircuts to execute, but the number of reputable hairdressers that have fucked it up over the years is astonishing, everything from not going over it tightly enough with the clippers and leaving little stray strands of hair, to arcing the liner too high over the ears until your sideburns look like Scott Ramsey’s from Neighbours. Nah. If you want to get your hair cropped, you need to go to a barbershop and allow the salon.